our realtionship
by Marahaprilmaybutters
Summary: We hate each other and love each other at the same time.I cant stand the sight of her and at the same time I cant stand it when she is out of my sight...What kind of relationship is this?
1. Chapter 1

A Love hate realtionship

I hate Buttercup as much as I love her. I cant stand the sight of her but at the same time I cant stand it when she gets out my sight of during day, we fight furiously and at night we ...you get that part right!. I am obssesive about her and at the same time she is my biggest enemy.

I remember clearly the time when I asked her out on a date ...actually forced her to go out with me

*********Flash back******

"for the 145 time butch I dont wanna go out with you..." she said angryly

"for the 146 time will you go out with me" I asked again while smirking

"no!" she shouted " and stop following me!" she added

"not untill you say yes!" I said stubbornly

"butch I really need to go to washroom please I gotta ...pee" she said uncomfortably

"sure, just say yes!" I said

"I ..need to go..." she pleaded

"sure , let me just come with you!" I said

"your such a pervert...ok! I will go out happy now let me go.." she said while snatching her hand from me

"sure babes! I will pick you at 7" I said while giving her the way .

She muttered something about "boys now a days"

********over*****************

who knew that my little crush on her will turn into love in no time...I recall the time when I told her that how much I was head over heels in love with her?

***********flashback************

"where are you taking me ?" she demanded . I growled

"its a surprise" I said coldly.

I had blindfoolded her eyes ,thats why she was soo irrated.

"here ! open it " I said harshly "bitch" I whispered but she heard me

"Did u just called me bitch" she shouted

"it means

b 4 beautifull

i 4 intellegent

t 4 talented

c 4... huh..." I stopped

She hissed "whatever! bastard"

She opened her eyes "wow" she exclaimed

I had litten up 1500 candels around a fountain which was full of colours I lent to the ground"seriously Butters you are the last person "I expected I will fall in love with, I am uncounditionally in love with you" I said while holding her hand .She narrowed her eyes and said " are you done?" she said ."Isnt it supposed to be an emotional part " I reminded her

"I am not washing your clothes" she said and she turned around to walk away." does that mean you love me aswell!" I said while holding her smirked" Conditionally" she answered

"what condition!" I asked . "you will not get all mushy with me in private seriously dude thats embarrasing" she replied

"since when did you care what people think?" I asked in an irrtated tone

"since I said yes ! I love you aswell to my biggest enemy" she replied as she faced me

"you never said that to me" I informed

"I did now" she replied

"does that mean I can kiss you" I said in hurrah tone

"conditonally" she remineded

I pinned her to the wall and kissed her she replied very lightly suddenly she pushed me

"enough spit sharing.." she growled " yuck" she added

************over******************

The time when I finnaly had guts to propose her . man that was difficult!I still shiver when I remember it.

***********flashback**********

"soo! how do you plan to purpose her" Brick asked

"simple! its international Cake day soo I am gonna give her A choclate cake and inside I will hide a ring" I answered excitedly

"good luck ... oh and before you go can you atlest insure your self " he said

I growled. Butters isnt that tough

So as planned I hid the ring in the cake and called Butters to a coffe shop . Two hours were left so I decided to take a nap.I woke after 3 hours

"Oh my gosh! I am an hour late" I shouted in shock

I rushed to the coffe shop there she was sitting. She looked really angry I remembered the quote If looks could kill.I gulped . _why am I scare of a girl?_. She glared at me

"If I havent promised Prof that I wont kill anyone I swear I wouldnt think twice to kill you" she growled . " Darling! My bad here have some cake " I offered with glared at me and then at the cake and then she smiled surprisingly."ooh! thanks for providing me with weopen to hit you" she said then before I could act she snatch the cake and shoved it on my face."Happy international cake day" she growled . I fell on the ground hitting my head with a table."ouch!" I said while rubbing my stared at me for a while then she bended on her knees and kissed me on my cheek . Strange!.

"Choclate my favriote" she said . She bit her lower lip then hestatingly she pulled out something that was sticking to my cheek " the ring".She wore it. She smiled again people around us clapped while I stared at Butters like a Dumb.

She blushed.

*****over****************

Nobody teaches  
Volcanoes to erupt,  
Tsunamis to devastate,  
Hurricanes to sway around

no one teaches  
How to choose a Wife,

NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.

that was my moto after our marriage. As I said I loved her and at the same time hated her.I remember the 1st night after our marriage

*********flashback*********

I entered in the room . She already changed into her pajamas. She was licking ice cream . I went and sat beside her ."ohh!Butch you smell like dog." she commented

"thanks Bitch" I replied much for our first night.

"Soo... here are my conditions" she said while turning the tv off.

"you will take a bath daily , you will cook, clean and wash and..."I cut her off and said" hey! hey! hey! your my wife your suppose to do all that stuff" I said

"I am your wife not servent" she said

"and I am your husbend not maid" I replied

She glared at me and the next moment I felt a punch on my face ...that was sudden so I couldnt block her.I felt on the ground she sat on top of me and said"memorise this poem by heart Butch!

LOVE IS LIFE  
LIFE IS WIFE  
WIFE IS KNIFE

and  
KNIFE IS DANGEROUS" she said furiously

I pushed her off me." you know what I am outta here" I said . She hissed " Get out of the door" I walked out harshly ... then I remembered a promise she made before our marriage I went back in.

"what ? you scared" she said while smirking

" Pufft! I just rememebered your promise" I said

"what? promise ?" she said in a shock

I smirked and took two steps close to her which seemed enough to remind gulped ." Can we do it tommarow night Butch!" she said sweetly.

"nope!" I said as I got close to her

She blushed, "I am not ready yet!" she said

"Who cares? " I said while unbuttoning my forced a smile "preety please" she said

I pulled her close to me and tore her shirt .She sighed

4 hours later

"thats it Enough !" she shouted as she pulled me away

"but we were just getting started" I said while pulling her close again "no!" she replied .

In a half hour I felt sleepy just when I closed my eyes she shouted "Up! Quick! My husband is back!"

I got up, jumps out of the window,  
hurts himself, and then realizes: "Damn, I am the husband!"

I heard a evil laugh."honey!are you hurt?"she said in Told-u-not-to-mess-with-me Tone.

The next morning

I woke up finding myself holding her tight to my both were naked...well if you dont count the peices if clothes on Butters woke up minytes later .As she got up she groned"that was the worst sleep I ever had" she said

Last night after her little prank I made sure that she didnt sleep the whole night.

She looked at me for a while and then said "When i open my eyes every morning, I pray to God that everyone should have a boyfriend like you….Why should only i suffer!"

"darling! not boyfriend I am your respectable husbend now ..." I growled back

******over*******

The small little fights we had ...that were almsot the third most important thing in our life.

*******flashback*******

Bubbles have gifted A wild dog to Butters as our wedding gift..I swear Butters's whole family is crazy LIKE HER.

Butters was now trying to make the dog obey her"Fetch! jim" she said as she threw a didnt even move.I laughed

"u will never succeed in making that dog obey u!"I said  
She rooled her eyes but then plained her expression and replied "Nonsense it's only a matter of patience, I had a lot of trouble with u at first."

On the following evening

Phill and Bill my old school pals invited me to a party which Phil's sister Kate was hostinng.

"come on! dude It will be most exciting, wildest party in the histroy of parties"Phill said to convince me to agree

"no! I cant I promised Butters to take her to premiere tonight"I said

"Come on! dude Irona will be there I bet she is more hot than your wife" Bill said

I rooled my eyes and said "No girl on this huge planet can be apealing to me more than Butters! she is my whole life...and she is my choice and you know that my choice is always the best"

"but dude! IRona ...She have got a perfect figure and" before phill finished I said" dude! you havent seen Butters...and I dont want you to see her anyway she is the awssomest and hottest she have got the perfect body you know my favriote 36,24,36 ... she is competing , understanding and the love of my existence" I said in afficonate tone

"I understand that you love her but...dude she is cool!" Bill said.

"and you want me to take advantage" I asked

"yes"they both answered immediatly

"well!I guess I can come over for ..15 minutes or less"I said

After 6 hours

I was on my way back to home after a very wild party...Damn shit I forgot to cancel our plans with butters!Shit expected she was swaiting for me

"where were you?" she asked as soon as she caught a glimpse of me

"well!Phill and Bill invited me to Kate's party and..."before I completed she brust

"you are saying that you kept me waiting in this cold for 3 hours just so you could go to those two cartoons party"She shouted"you cold have called atleast" she added

"damn it!I am always on fault...you always say that I am inconsedrate"I shouted

"well!you are!and now you are fighting with me.."she shouted

"fight about what?you know I hate messing with you ...god! I swear this marriage thing must be made by women cuz all you women like is to fight" I shouted"Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means…**W**ithout **I**nformation, **F**ighting **E**verytime!"I added

"No darling , it means :**W**ith **I**diot **F**or **E**ver" she growled

"did you call me Idiot!"I shouted

"yes!because thats what you are?"She replied

"oh really!"I said.I pinned her to wall and said"you are gettin out of control women!one more word and you will find your self in ICU"I threatend

"ICU huh!"how would you feel if you don't see me for two days?" she said  
'that would be great'I replied

Monday passed and I didnt see her..Tuesday and wednesday passed too…..,On thursday my swelling became better, And now I could see her from the  
Corner of one eye.

******over******

Love and mating was the second improtand thing in our life well my life...She was my incomplete thirst the more I tried to finish the more I would get thirsty

********flashback******

During weekends , We didnt fight...I know amzing right...two days of peace in a week she agreed to this on one term and that term was that I would cook.

Right now I was preparing breakfast while she was taking shower though right I was fighting the argue to join her.I smiled as I smelled her body scent as she came out she tip toed to me

She hugged me from back and I held my brethe.

"butters!seriously If I activate now I wont stop till monday and you dont want to do that right!"I said while resisting

"I dont know what are you saying Butch?I am just paying my cook" she said and kissed my neck.

"I swear if I found out that you pay the same amount to gardner and waiters I am going to kill you mistress"I said while griiting my teeth she laughed and kissed my back.

"I warned you but now my dear its tooo late I am activated"I said while turning around.

I attacked her mouth kissing her hardly and as usual she replied softly.I tore her clothes ...and you dont wanna know the next

**********over***********

I remember clearly how I freaked out when doctor told me she had thypoid...I use to stay up all night and see her burn in fever

*********flashback*****

"butch...I am sorry"she said weekly.I closed my eyes so she wont see my tears...Watching her suffering like this killed me

"for what?darling"I asked in most afficonate tone

"for disturbing you"she replied in babyish tone

"no!darling !honey you are not disturbing me ...at all"I replied while kissing here forehead

"I love you!Butch I am really sorry I always fight with you"she replied

********over********

I didnt fought with her even after she was well again...but immediatly after she became healthy she ...

*******flashback*****

"what happened Bubbs"I asked Bubbles in a super worried tone

"I dont know she just passed out"she replied

"its ok!"the doc said as she came out "she is fine and there is a good news"

"what?what good news"

"she is pregent

*********over*********

After that news life was like heaven but during the whole time I sensed that she was hiding something from me that secret reaveled to me during the time of her delivry

****flashback****

"can I get a glass of water plase"I heared phill say

I was in washroom completly naked so I couldnt go outside

"sure!"buttes replied

It was her ninth went to the kitchen.I went outside."guys ! I got a new poster can u help me stick it "I said

They agreed .Brick and Boomer were already upstairs...That when butters decided to come upstairs to give phill the water glass he asked carefully climbed upstairs but Alas!She dropped some water on the 6th stair ...she came upstairs and gave him the water.I was on the top floor I tried to stop her

"butters!wait.."I shouted

"dont overreact seriously I am perfectly capable of going downstairs"she replied

she took another step and suddlney she slipped ..I couldnt feel my legs

She rooled down and shouted painfully as she landed on floor...I almost jumped from top floor to her

"oh my god!butters"I said as I held her wrist

She cried from pain

"call the ambulance brick...boomer ...phill"I shouted

We took her to hospital in next 15 mins ...she cried from pain I never felt scared in my life...I might lose her no!no!

the nurses took her to labour room ..I heard painful cries..I shivered.I saw the doc almost running she went inside and came after a while

"its the most dangerpus case ever..I told her she wast capable of giving birth..."before she finished

"what?what do you mean?"I asked

"after the thypoid...she wasnt capable of giving a birth to a child for almost a year or two she was week but she wont admit...and now after this accident there is one in a ,million chances of her to be saved"the doc replied

"no!no!please save her!I will do anything just save her"I replied

"we will try our best"she replied

*******over*********

No..no...I cant lose her...god !please...

I felt panic attack as the painfull crys stop and I heard a baby cry

the nurse came outside with the baby

"how is my wife?"I asked eagrly

"not in a very good condition sir"she replied

I gulped..I felt boomer's hand on my shoulder

"she will be fine"he said

I cringned "what if she doesnt?what if she dies?"I asked

I looked over to bubbs and bloss who started soobing again as they heard my question

The docter came outside

"I am sorry"she said

I felt nothing for a while...no...the reason of my existense was finished ...I dont need to live anymore ...I need to see her...one last time one last glimpse of her dead peacefull beautifull face.I went inside..there she laid dead.

"no!butters you promised you will be the pain of my butt forever...please wake up !if you die who will irritate me ?huh come on please"I said and then I heard a giggle

"you are right!I really need to be around to kill you from irritation"a sweet voice said

"you!you almost scared me to death"I shouted

"haha!I know I just wanna see how much will you be happy if I die?"she said with a chuckle

I took a deep breathe and answered"never do it again...I love you" I said

"I know"she replied with a grin

"hey!this is the part where you are suppose to say I love you too and kiss me"I remineded her

She smiled and said"ok!OK!I love you too happy!"

I smiled and kissed her on forehead

"did u really believe that I will leave u that easily"butters said

"your the pain in my butt"I repeated

She smiled."where is my child"she said

"right her mam!a very beautifull doughter"a nurse said

"what shall we name her?"I asked

"Vaneesa"she said

"nope too girly waht about bella"I said

"noo gadbreealla"she said

"I say hannah..."I said

"noooo jenny"she said

Oh boy!our argument have no end just like our love

Review please


	2. Chapter 2

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."

That man was tall well built ,and handsome. Butch jojo.

Suddenly a black haired girl appeared from behind "Butch"

"what the hell you think you are doing?" she asked

Butch smirked "see what did I say"

The woman smiled.

"hello! Mrs.! Your Mr here was worried for you…" she said

"oh really" Buttercup asked

"yes Mrs you should probably keep track of him" The woman answered.

"I would" Buttercup said.

HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN Arrive naked ... with beer.

Aren't we men more simple…I wish women knew that they are all like feelings and bla…bla.. I mean come on once your past getting the girl I don't feel like impressing anymore but no these girls want someone like I don't know a perfect man I are not perfect…I remember our wedding Me and Butters

during the wedding rehearsal, the I approached the priest with an unusual offer: "Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out." I passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied. On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the my vows, the priest looked the to me in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?" I gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes, I do" then I leaned toward the priest and hissed: "I thought we had a deal." The priest put a $100 bill into my hand whispered: "She made me a better offer."

You must be wondering why I am even thinking of this stuff. well

Marriage is like Deck of cards. At first its all diamonds and hearts but at end you'll wish you have fucking spaids and clubs..

Not that I regret my marriage..oh who am I kidding I fucking hate marriages. A week ago I was watching a movie at home  
and suddenly shouts nooooooooooooo! :'(  
Don't go inside the church its a trap!

Buttercup: what are u watching?

Me: our wedding DVD :p

Its just isn't like she use to be .All the time blabbering about chores and other stuff. She never goes out with me now. She never listens to me. Its not the same anymore. But she is hell a lot of more violent

. Just yesterday I went to a party where

A famous inspirational speaker said:  
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"  
we were in shock then  
He added: "she was my mother"  
A big round of applause & laughter!

I tried to crack this at home  
After a dinner, I said loudly to buttercup in the kitchen:  
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"  
but alas I forgot the second line

by the time I gained my senses,  
I was on a hospital bed,  
recovering from burns of boiling water!

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT I LEARNT A VALUABLE LESSON

Don't copy if you cant paste

"snap out of it" buttercup growled

"what" I asked

"you're thoughts you bloody idiot and drive carefully …or you will get us in an accident …again ….4th time this week..i don't know whats wrong with you..you are always lost…"

I growled "you know what B.c"

"what?" she hissed

"If you were my husband,  
I would poison your coffee" I said

She smirked "If you were my wife  
I would drink it."

"shutup!" I growled

"you shutup" she replied

Well let me tell you how all of it started

Buttercup bought A New Sim  
Card Puts It In Her Phone  
And Decides To Surprise me When I was  
on Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen,  
Calls me With  
The New Number:

"Hello Darling" I Responds  
In A Low Tone:

"Let Me Call U Back  
Later Honey, The Dumb  
Lady Is In The Kitchen.. =P

No.. I am not cheating on her. I just talk to other women for fun…I love to make Butters jealous..so I thought it would be humorous but no ….she doest get humor.

Since that day ..she had made my life a living hell.

It got worse when I forgot her birthday.

She became rude ..very rude not to mention when my mom came up.

Butters and my mum had that special bond of tom and jerry. I remember how I use to hate when they use to fight but after this particular phone incident . BC went crying to my mum and they are now best of friends which is horrible because they both now make my life miserable

I remember my mum that evening

"butch! You idiot?"she said as she stromed in the house

"oh! Come on not you again…"

"buttercup ! what happened why are you crying?" she said

Buttercup rushed to my mom as she hugged her

"oh! Sara! He ..he sniff cheated on me" she said

"you prick" my mum shouted

"mum!its not what you think!" I replied

"butch ! she is the only woman I can trust to handle you" she said

"oh really…just yesterday you said Bc is a big mistake"I said

"because darling you're my baby …and every mother consider wife a threat" she answered

"Sara..oh sara… he cheated..oh sniff sniff" butters said

"I didn't I just talk to Morbugs that's it"I said

Whack. whack. My mum slapped me.

"mum!" I said

Since than its been like

"bloody cheater liar" she mumbled

"I wasn't lying, I was just writing fiction with my mouth" I mumbled back.

It takes patience to listen.. it takes skill to pretend you're listening. Yes I am trying to be a good husband.

Now a days which is not working

For example like

"hey there Buttercups! You seem worried any problem?" I asked while coming closer

"Oh... I didn't tell you... Then It must be none of your business..." she replied

Or like one time

"hey butters … I wore the clogne you love"

"**Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?**** '"**

I made her lunch even

"yeah the burnt lunch" she said

Bloody woman can read my mind now

We reached home.

As usual I parked the car and picked everything up. As I opened house.

I heared a loud roar Happy birthday….

Woah….really..

"happy birthday butchie boy"Butters said with her cute smile which I so missed

"butters I am so sorry …I didn't knew I hurted you so much" I said

"its ok! Butchie boy" she said with a smirk

"I will give you my surprise later at night " she whispered. I felt hair rose up on my back.

Hair wasn't only thing that rose.

" stop thinking weird stuff about my daughter in law or you will need a birthday cap and that's not for your scum filled head." Mum said

"shesh mum! Stop being dirty" I said

Brick asked "say butch Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" and accidently I replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong woman."

"what do you mean?"butters said furious ..

Oh shit No!


End file.
